


Ghosty Trickster

by cowboypda



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Dave is not a ghost, Humanstuck, It's kinda sad, John is a ghost, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-24
Updated: 2013-05-31
Packaged: 2017-12-06 08:46:45
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 8
Words: 1,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/733773
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cowboypda/pseuds/cowboypda
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Your name is Dave Strider and your dead boyfriend is haunting you.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prolouge

**Author's Note:**

> all i have done is this im so sorry ill post more later okay,,

Your name is Dave Strider and you're pretty goddamn sure your dead boyfriend is haunting you. He died two months ago and you're still finding his shit just laying around the house. You know you packed it all up and put it in your studio, a room you haven't used since he died. Every time you look for a movie you find one of his dumb movies, such as ghost busters or shrek (okay, maybe thats just the horrible packing skills you inherited). Or when you finally get someone to come over and talk, something falls on their head. Something like one of his dumb snacks, which you were sure you had ran out over.

  
Your name is John Egbert and your boyfriend has been ignoring you for the last two months, save for the few times he calls out your name, usually at night when he's drunk. You're starting to get kind of angry with him. He keeps packing up your stuff and putting it away. You ask him to play music for you but all he does is sit around and mope. Once in a while he brings company over and they just act like you're dead or chopped liver.


	2. Chapter 1, In which Dave can hear John for the first time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ha ha ha,, odd chapters are in daves pov and evens are in johns

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i typed this on my 3ds so i apologize now for all typos

As previously mentioned, your name is Dave Strider and currently you're looking at extremely stupid methods for talking ghosts or summoning them. You scroll the options, laughing at the stupidity of some of them. Seonces, offerings, attempt to talk to them. These are all fucking bullshit. Maybe you should ask Aradia about this crap. You'll call her up later about it. 

"Dave? Why are you looking at that stuff?" You jump and look around. Did you just hear John? Fuck, now you're going crazy. There's a loud huff and the sound of someone sitting down at John's computer. Your phone beeps and you look at it.

ectoBiologist began pestering turntechGodhead.  
EB: dave, why won't you answer me?  
TG: whoever this is needs to stop  
TG: haha johns dead and daves mourning him oh man i better go make fun of him  
TG: its not funny  
EB: dead? i'm not dead! dave, i'm right here.  
TG: oh my god i bet youre getting tons of laughs out of this  
turntechGodhead blocked ectoBiologist.


	3. 2- Dead? No way.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> john thinks about the possibility of being dead

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> enjoy (johns pov)

You stare at Dave in disbelief for a good two minutes before getting up and heading to your bed on the couch to contemplate the fact that you might be dead. Not that you think you are. If you were, you should be in heaven with Dad and Nana. But no, you're here with your ass of a boyfriend. 

You lay down on the couch, letting out a small grunt as you tried to get comfy. Maybe you are dead though. That sure would explain why Dave's been acting this way the past two months, wouldn't it? Attempting to clap the lights off (dave's idea), you let out an extremely disgruntled noise, sounding a bit like a hibernating bear waking up and fall asleep after rolling yourself so your face was shoved in the couch, blocking out any and all sun.


	4. 3- Pick up the phone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> dave calls aradia

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> who even types on computers anymore

You drum you fingers impatiently on your knee. The phone was ringing in your ear, playing some spooky 8-bit song that Aradia had as her caller tone. It's rung six times now, and that makes you wonder if she's up. You mentally punch yourself for that. It's eight thirty a.m. right now, of course she's up.   
"Hello?" A male voice answers. You jump, and look at the phone to check if it's the right number. It is.  
"Hi. Can I talk to Aradia?" The man shouts for Aradia, who runs to answer the phone.   
"Hi! Who is this?" Her voice is happy, probably happiest you've heard this early in the morning.  
"Dave. Dave Strider. I called you a week ago about my dead boyfriend?"  
"Oh right! You want to know how to find out if he's haunting you?" You nod, but then realize she can't see if you nod. You're on the phone.   
"How can I do that?"  
"I'll have to come over and check it out. I'll be over at six okay?"  
"Kay. Thanks and bye."  
"Bye!"

You end the call and relax in your seat, spooning some cereal into your mouth.


	5. 4 - John does something, god knows what though

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i literally have no idea what to do with this fic leave suggestions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh man short chapters are my way of saying 'fuck this fic i dont know whats happening'

John huffed, still laying on the couch and twirling your thumbs. You now realize that you are, infact, dead. That also hinders you to stay inside the apartment ALL day. That's absolutely sucky, if anyone actually cares. You situp and turn on the t.v. flipping channels halfheartedly, trying to find something good on. You settle on some cartoon. Dave left you here about an hour ago, locking the door and turning off everything. What an ass, doesn't he realize he has a ghost to cater to? He can't just leave! That's- That's- That's just mean! You continue your silent protest, angrily watching the turtles on screen fight crime. You begin to wonder where he went. Maybe he has a date. Maybe he's out of food. Maybe he's going to meet Karkat(one of his close friends). Maybe he's going to get a job now that he doesn't have your ass to support him. Who knows?

* * *

 

Two hours later.

* * *

Dave stomps in rather miffed, obviously upset with his date(that's the conclusion you've settled on, he left in rather nice clothes). He flops down on couch next to you, but not recognizing your status as lord of the couch. 

"JOHN! WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABO- oh, right." You make a sad noise as his sentence ends in the solemn tone it did. He must of forgotten for a second. What if you could still date him from the beyond? That'd be cool. You hope that can happen. Maybe you'll start writing him notes that he can read. You haven't been able to get him to hear you again, so notes seem like your last chance. You'll do that tomorrow.

 


	6. 5 WOAH STUFF HAPPENS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> shhh only se(y?)onces now  
> also this continues in the next chapter through johns pov nbd

You look to the door as a knock echoes through the house. It must be time. Glancing at your watch, you head to the door. As you open it, you're greeted with a hello from Aradia whom gracefully invites herself into your house. "So, Dave! Ready to get this dead boyfriend party started?" She grins at you, giggling quietly at her sentence. You nod.   
"I am so fucking ready. Flip me over and stick a fork in me cause I'm done. Now, how exactly do I do this?" You question, studying her expressions. She pulls out a small book, flipping through it. Stopping on a page, she reads it for a moment. "We need to sit at the table, turn off the lights and link hands." She announces, grabbing your hand and dragging you to the table. She forces you into the chair and you have to comply. "Sit here." she instructs, running to turn off the lights. It's dark now and you hear her sit in the chair on the opposite side. "Uhhh." You can hear her rummaging through her bag, a few minutes later she lets out a small 'aha!' and sits a candle on the table, lighting it. You can see her now, her round face illuminated by the flickering flame. Honestly, she looks really pretty like this. Not that you'd ever tell her. No fucking way. "Place your hands on the table and link them with mine." You do as she says, grasping her hand like your life depends on it. "Now be quiet while I attempt to connect with John."


	7. 6- You're talking to him. Him. The real Dave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gomen i had stuff going on and ive been out of town!! please enjoy this lame-o chapter

You stare at Aradia, sitting across from dave. You step closer to her, her body sucking you in like a vacuum. You blink and gasp. You're in her now. Part of her body. "J-john?!?" Dave stutters out, grabbing her- no -your hand. You nod and smile at him. "God. I feel like I'm ghost dad right now." You joke and Dave laughs. "Or that movie, over her dead body." He grins at you, his voice full of joy. "Dave?" You suddenly blurt out, your voice serious now.  
"Yeah?"  
"How did it happen?"  
"How did what happen?" His voice falters as he asks you. He knows what you're asking. What he's afraid of explaining. You take in a deep breath and look him in the eye.  
"How did I die?" He swallows and tears begin to roll down his cheeks. Oh shit. You made him cry. Fucking hell. This is not what you wanted to do. He wipes his eyes with his sleeves and opens his mouth to speak.  
"Car crash. You were driving. I distracted you wi-with a ring. I was proposing. You crashed into a tree when you started to exclaim 'yes' in that high pitched voice you have when you're excited. I, thankfully, made it out with a broken arm and a concussion." He explains. You breathe in a raggedy breath and lean across the table to hug him.   
"Thanks." You mutter. "Also, Dave?"  
"Yeah?"  
"Don't forget me. I still live here you know. Also, I happen to be supreme ruler of couch, stop sitting on it, fat ass."  
Dave scoffs and mutters "I love you."


	8. fuck guys im so sorry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fuck

Okay, so I'm just going to inform you guys right now that I will probably never update this fanfic again. I've ran out of ideas for it and honestly I'm kinda of tired of the ship. You guys seemed to really enjoy this and I find that great, but I really just don't want to write anything else for this. But I will, however, write more fics. They probably won't be JohnDave anymore but, hey, atleast you guys got this much pepsicola out of me! If you guys have anymore fic ideas that I could do one shots of, leave a comment? Laters, and sorry I had to end this.


End file.
